This couple decided to share their marriage lessons with everyone, and here is the result of 17 years together.
9 LESSONS WE LEARNED OVER 17 YEARS OF MARRIAGE
- HAVE LOTS OF SEX
- COMMUNICATE OBSESSIVELY
- LIFT EACH OTHER UP
- BE NICE – ESPECIALLY WHEN IT’S HARD
- EAT TOGETHER & GOOD FOOD
- DATE EACH OTHER
- DON’T KEEP SCORE
- HAVE A SHARED VISION
- BE WILLING TO GROW & CHANGE
After 17 years of marriage, this couple didn’t write a book or give a TED Talk—they held up a sign. Nine simple lessons, handwritten and heartfelt, that reflect the real work of love. Their message resonated because it wasn’t polished—it was lived.
1. Have Lots of Sex Intimacy isn’t just physical—it’s emotional, spiritual, and connective. Prioritizing sex means prioritizing closeness, vulnerability, and playfulness. It’s not about frequency—it’s about presence.
2. Communicate Obsessively Marriage thrives on clarity. From daily logistics to deep fears, obsessive communication means nothing is left to assumption. It’s how trust is built and misunderstandings are dismantled.
3. Lift Each Other Up In a world that often tears people down, marriage should be a sanctuary. Encouragement, praise, and belief in each other’s dreams are fuel for growth.
4. Be Nice – Especially When It’s Hard Kindness during conflict is the ultimate test. It’s easy to be nice when things are smooth. But when tensions rise, choosing gentleness over sarcasm or silence is transformative.
5. Eat Together & Good Food Meals are rituals. Sharing food creates rhythm, connection, and joy. Whether it’s takeout or homemade, sitting down together matters.
6. Date Each Other Romance doesn’t end after the wedding—it evolves. Dating keeps the spark alive. It’s a reminder that love is active, not passive.
7. Don’t Keep Score Resentment grows when love becomes transactional. Marriage isn’t a competition—it’s a collaboration. Forgiveness and generosity keep the balance.
8. Have a Shared Vision Couples who dream together stay together. Whether it’s parenting, travel, or retirement, shared goals create unity and direction.
9. Be Willing to Grow & Change People evolve. So must relationships. Flexibility, curiosity, and a willingness to adapt are what sustain love through decades.
These lessons echo what therapists and researchers have long said: successful marriages aren’t built on perfection—they’re built on intention. According to Dr. John Gottman, one of the leading marriage researchers, kindness and emotional attunement are stronger predictors of marital success than compatibility or shared interests.
This couple’s sign is more than advice—it’s a snapshot of commitment. It’s a reminder that love isn’t just a feeling—it’s a practice. And after 17 years, they’re still practicing.