My name is Eric, I’m 33, and I live in a walk-up apartment in Brooklyn, New York.
A few months ago, I started noticing a couple pigeons hanging out on our shared fire escape.
At first, it was kind of… whatever.
It’s New York. Pigeons exist. You see them, you ignore them, everyone moves on.
But then it escalated.
One morning, I opened my window and saw my upstairs neighbor leaning out, casually tossing what looked like bread crumbs onto the fire escape.
The pigeons went absolutely wild.
I didn’t think much of it at the time. I figured it was a one-off thing.
It was not.
It became a routine.
Every morning around the same time, she would come out and feed them.
And the pigeons?
They started showing up early.
Waiting.
Like they had a scheduled appointment.
Within a couple of weeks, we went from 2 pigeons to about 10.
Then 20.
Now?
I’m not exaggerating when I say there are easily 40+ pigeons on and around our fire escape at any given time.
It sounds like a full-on bird convention outside my window.
Constant cooing.
Flapping.
And the occasional aggressive wing slap against the metal railing that makes it sound like someone is trying to break in.
But the noise isn’t even the worst part.
It’s the mess.
There is pigeon… everything… everywhere.
The fire escape looks like it’s been professionally vandalized.
I can’t open my window without worrying something is going to fly directly into my apartment.
And forget about fresh air.
That option is gone.
So I finally decided to say something.
I ran into my neighbor in the hallway and brought it up as politely as I could.
I said something like, “Hey, I think the pigeons might be getting a little out of control.”
She smiled and said, “Oh, they’re harmless. I’ve just been feeding them a little.”
A little.
I didn’t even know how to respond to that.
I mentioned the noise and the mess, and she just kind of shrugged and said, “They’ll go away eventually.”
They have not gone away.
If anything, they’ve started bringing friends.
At this point, I’m pretty sure we’ve accidentally created a permanent pigeon community.
I talked to my landlord, who said they’d “look into it,” which I’ve learned usually means nothing will happen anytime soon.
So now I’m stuck in this weird situation where my fire escape has basically turned into a bird sanctuary I never agreed to.
And every morning, like clockwork, the feeding continues.
I don’t want to start a full-on neighbor war…
But I also don’t want to live in what feels like the world’s loudest, messiest aviary.
So now I’m wondering what the next move even is.
Because at this rate, I’m one step away from naming them and charging rent.
